At the 7 week mark, I find myself stuck in neutral, not willing to go back but not finding the drive to move forward. I don't like this place. It's non productive and I find myself not wanting to go anywhere or do anything. Looking at myself objectively it occurred to me this may not be the healthiest place so I tried an experiment today.
The one household chore I despise most, other than cooking, is dusting. I told myself that if I got myself up and dusted one room I would reward myself with a bubble bath complete with candles. As it turned out I felt so good after completing one room that I got out the vacuum cleaner, then the bathroom cleaners. Tomorrow I will challenge myself again to dust the main bedroom and remove the clutter of keepsakes from the dresser.
Whether we're grieving or not we tend to get stuck in one place. Challenge yourself to take the first step whether it's something menial as mine was, or stepping out of your comfort zone by trying something new. Push yourself to make the first move. Be kind to yourself though. Make a to do list with only one thing on it. That list will eventually get you moving. Do not throw it away. It's there to remind us that there is more to our world and we need to live it now for NOW is the only thing that is assured. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is uncertain.
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